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Invitation Etiquette You’ve set date, decided on a theme and chosen your dress. Now it’s time to spread the word. Your wedding invitations will set the tone for your special day and should reflect your personal style and taste. It’s the first official message about the event that your guests will receive, so make it special.
An invitation to a wedding can be made by word of mouth, by telephone, or by email. The main objective is to make sure that guests know the who, what, when, and where of the event.
CHOOSE YOUR STYLE
Begin by deciding whether your wedding is a formal, traditional or more contemporary occasion and make your invitation selection accordingly. The invitation you choose conveys the formality and tone of your event through the formality of the paper, letter font, and style; the more formal your wedding, the more formal the invitation.
The traditional formal invitation is elegantly simple, usually in black ink printed on a heavy white or cream coloured card. The card may be either flat or folded with the printing traditionally on the front. There's a wide array of suitable papers, plain or embossed to choose from and you can make your personal mark by selecting a beautiful typestyle.
Wedding invitations are traditionally printed with black ink in an "engraved" or script type style. These more traditional type styles are also appropriate for use on invitations to a less formal event. | |  |
Although modern laser printers are increasingly being used to print the wording of invitations some people prefer the more traditional methods of thermography and engraving.
Thermography produces raised ink on paper by a heat process. Invitations are printed in ink and a special powder is sprinkled over the wet ink. Then the invitation is sent through a heater, which melts the powder and "raises" the ink. A less expensive alternative, engraving is a time honoured process of raising ink on paper that involves etching metal plates, filling the etches with ink then pressing paper into the plates.
If you choose a more contemporary invitation, you have a huge selection of exciting possibilities. Many contemporary couples love the freedom modern invitations give to tailor the invitation uniquely to their personalities. If you have a theme or colour scheme in mind (celtic, medieval, black & white, gold), look for invitations that echo this.
WHEN TO ORDER
Order your invitations as soon as your date, time and place have been confirmed. Three to six months before the ceremony is what most expert planners suggest. Give yourself or your calligrapher at least a month to hand address, assemble, and stamp the invitations and reply envelopes, aiming to post the invitations out to your guests 6-8 weeks before the day.
PLAYING THE NUMBER GAME
To calculate the number of invitations to order, count one invitation for each of the following: a) couple (married or living together), b) family with children under 18, c) each child 18 years or older and still living at home, d) single guest,
e) fiancée/fiancé of a guest, and f) invited boy-or-girl friend of a guest. For example, in a house with one set of parents and five children (one child 17, one 14 and three children 18 and older), four invitations would be sent. One would be sent to the parents with the name of the 17 year old and the 14 year old added, and one each to the three siblings 18 and older
Once you've done this, add a few more invites to your order for keepsakes and any last-minute guests as re-orders can be expensive.
THE REPLY/RSVP
It's becoming increasingly popular for couples to include response cards with their invitations. Years ago a formal, handwritten guest's reply letter was the most common way a guest would reply, but for expediency and your guests convenience you may want to include response cards.
Some guests may forget to write their names on the response card. In order to keep track of who responds and who does not, make a list of your guests with a number assigned to each name. Mark the corresponding number in pencil on the back of each response card. You will know quickly who has and has not replied.
If you choose not to use a reply card, which is also known as a RSVP card, you would simply write RSVP or "a reply is requested by date" at the bottom your reception invitation.
ADDRESSING YOUR ENVELOPES
Believe it or not, how you address your envelope is just as important as how you write your invitations. Proper wedding invitation etiquette dictates the envelopes be written out by hand, using ink. While it may be quicker and easier to zip off a couple of hundred address labels on the laser printer, this is considered a major faux pas. Even if you have several hundred guests attending, the invitations should be hand written.
ASSEMBLING YOUR INVITATIONS
You may have a number of things which you'll want to include in your envelopes - response cards, maps, gift list cards etc. Lay everything out in the order in which each will be placed into the envelope, making sure that you have the same amount of each item. All enclosures would be placed facing the back flap of the envelope on top of the invitation, so the guest can read each as she opens the invitation-most important on the bottom to least important on top.
For example:
• Invitation
• Tissue, if used
• Reception invitation
• Response card
WEDDING INVITATION WORDING
Much debate revolves around how to word a wedding invitation. Typically the bride's parents would issue the invitations, because traditionally they would host their daughter's wedding. However these days, more and more couples are paying for their own weddings or the costs are split between the couple and both sets of parents.
If the bride's parents are paying for the wedding, their names should be included on the invitation. It should be the bride's parents who are announcing the event and requesting the honour or pleasure of the guests' company. If the parents aren't paying for the affair, it will be the happy couple themselves who are requesting the honour of everyone's presence.
In addition to the parents or bride and groom requesting their guest's presence, the invitation should list the date of the event, and the time and location of the ceremony. If the wedding is a black tie affair, this should also be indicated on
the invitation.
For truly formal events, there are certain rules of etiquette that are observed when writing an invitation. For less formal situations you can be more creative. WJ
Here are some things to remember when you're composing a formal invitation:
• Write out names in full, including middle names. Omit a middle name if
necessary, rather than using an initial.
• It's appropriate to use the British spelling for "honour" and "favour", unless
you prefer to use the American spelling of these words.
• Spell out all words, including the hour, the date and the year. Spell out all
words in the address, including Street, Road and Avenue. The two
exceptions to this rule in an address are Saint (St.) and Mount (Mt.)
• Use Roman numerals in names, rather than "the third" or "3rd."
• For ceremonies taking place in a house of worship, use "request the honour
of your presence." Ceremonies taking place in a non-religious setting
should say, "request the pleasure of your company." |
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I posted 4 photos on Facebook in the album "Bridal inspiration from Cannes...." 
