7 Deadly Passion Killers

If your answer to the question, 'how much sex are you having?' is, 'not enough', then read on.

Planning a wedding is time consuming and exhausting. All the hours spent visiting suppliers, sourcing ideas on the internet and meeting planners can mean that there isn't any time left for you and your relationship.

As a result your once healthy sex life may have sizzled out to nothing.

So the question now is, "how do you get your libido back?"

There are many factors (physiological and psychological) that can affect libido including: hormonal problems, lifestyle, mind set (which includes assumptions and expectations) and mental fatigue. Tying for a baby can also put huge pressure on your sexual relationship.

The 7 most common passion killers are:

1. Stress and pressure around sex, especially at the fertile time

Sex can be a source of stress for men particularly if the woman is demanding sex around ovulation, and if they have been trying to conceive for a while. Stress around sex can sabotage future attempts. Couples need to take the pressure off one another. Don't discuss every detail of your fertility - sex should be a time for emotional bonding - not a time for focused baby-making.

2. Relationship problems and issues may hold the key.

Sex is often subconscious - there may be many undercurrents: simmering arguments, resentments and pressure on the man around the fertile time; the female partner not wanting sex after the fertile time. Communication and getting the intimacy back is key to improving your sex life: being kind to one another helps!

3. Alcohol

While a little alcohol is great for relaxation, too much alcohol can affect libido and deplete you of essential nutrients needed for hormonal balance.

4. Low testosterone

The hormone of desire, testosterone is needed by both men and women to regain intimacy and put the spark back into the relationship.

5. Poor diet

Blood sugar imbalance, processed foods, and weight issues may all contribute to low libido, exhaustion and hormonal imbalance. Foods rich in zinc, magnesium and B vitamins can help with testosterone and hormonal balance.

6. Lack of exercise

Exercise gets the blood flow going to the pelvic area releases endorphins that make you feel good and give you energy.

7. Tiredness and exhaustion

Generally comes from working too hard, having too many commitments and a negative mindset.

The good news is you have control over all of these passion killers. Make some changes! Simply being aware of the subconscious pressures is the best place to start.

Remember men and women have different brain chemistry. A man needs to know he is appreciated and loved for who he is, for a women kindness warmth and love pay huge dividends, its not always about the big romantic gesture. Try emptying the dishwasher, a cup of tea in bed, doing the shopping, cooking the odd meal I could go on and on!

Article by Zita West, Clinical Director at Zita West Clinic in London. www.zitawest.com