The date is set. The band is booked and you’re ready for the happiest day of your life. Whether you’ve been with each other years or have enjoyed a whirlwind romance, you might be wondering if your one and only really is for keeps.
If you’ve popped the question or answered yes to it, chances are you already know that your other half is the one. But just for some extra reassurance – you are making a really big commitment after all – here are five signs that the person you’re marrying is the one you should spend your life with.
Even when you fight you’re on the same team
Every couple fights. And any couple that tells you otherwise are either robots or lying. But it’s how you fight that decides your staying power as a couple. It’s a good sign if you’re both able to handle conflict and communicate effectively, and it’s particularly positive if even when you’re stone mad at one another the relationship doesn’t’ feel threatened. The important thing is that you both want to kiss and make up eventually and that you’re both willing to express your feelings and work through any difficulties.
You both want the same things
You’ve discussed the fundamentals, like where you want to live and whether you want to have kids, but you’ve also discussed other things, like how your values align when it comes things like politics, spirituality, family, and crucially, your expectations of the relationship. You don’t have to agree on everything, so long as the bugbears don’t seem like too big of a challenge to overcome.
You both have healthy independence
A healthy relationship isn’t one where you’re glued to each other 24/7. In fact, the strongest couples tend to be those who are able to enjoy their time apart. You should both have interests outside of the relationship and regular time apart to see friends. In the long run, it means you aren’t relying solely on one person to fulfil all of your needs. You have a level of autonomy and independence and that bodes well for a marriage.
You’re not afraid to be vulnerable around each other
Vulnerable can mean you feel entirely comfortable acting the complete eejit around your other half and it can also mean feeling safe enough to let your guard down around them, whether it’s to share your deepest secrets, reveal your most entrenched fears or having a safe space to cry. You should feel completely comfortable being the real you around this person, vulnerabilities and all.
The best part of getting married isn’t the wedding
Nope, it’s the idea of spending your lives together. While the idea of having a big do may seem exciting, it’s the part where you get to spend forever with your best friend that you’re most excited about. You can see yourself growing old with this person and you couldn’t be more psyched.